


of destiny & fate

by kirkwaltz (orphan_account)



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic, Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic: Knights of the Fallen Empire
Genre: F/M, Fate & Destiny, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-20
Updated: 2015-10-20
Packaged: 2018-04-27 08:31:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5041294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/kirkwaltz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She has never believed in destiny.</p>
            </blockquote>





	of destiny & fate

She has never believed in destiny, in fate, in luck, in anything that means she can't change what happens in the world. She has never once thought of anything in terms of destiny. What happens is because of the circumstances and the things that she can do, the things that she has already done. She doesn't believe in karma. She doesn't believe in gods or a future that she hasn't brought herself to, on her own. There is no way that whatever happens is because it's _supposed_ to. That just doesn't happen.

And why would she? Why would she believe in things like destiny and fate, which are just words?

The galaxy has never treated her fairly – she is no Jedi, no hero, no perfect savior, meant to rescue the galaxy from any threats that come it's way. She is no leader, she is no champion, no defender of the innocent and unprotected. Even if fate did exist, what would it have to do with her?

She has gotten herself to where she is – not destiny.  
  
  
When she was a girl, she wanted to fly. _But people can't fly,_ she was always told, and so instead she learned to fly in another way, by running. By piloting a ship.

She became a smuggler, taking goods in and out of places, being an almost hero to the people barricaded on planets like Ord Mantell.

Ord Mantell – where she met a man named Skaavak and a farm boy named Corso and got her ship stolen and realized that there is so much more out there that she's never realized before. She became a legend across the galaxy, a fire in her heart burning in a way that couldn't be quenched. Searching for treasure and revenge with the help of a would-be queen.

Never staying, always moving on – breaking hearts and stealing and running, always running. An outlaw became a vital asset to the war, a Republic privateer, despite her own will. A vital asset to the war became a pirate and a threat to the Republic, known as the Voidhound. A threat to the Republic became a forger of alliances and the galaxy's savior against Revan.

Was _that_ destiny? Was that fate?

Nothing was set in stone – no, she knew that. She knew that nothing was set in stone. She could change anything that happened, make it better, mold the galaxy into a home for herself.

But still she ran – from love, from family, from friendship.

The people she had made her family – Corso, Risha, Akaavi, Bowdaar, and Guss. The people she had worked with to defeat Revan – Lana Beniko, Jakarro, Satele Shan, Darth Marr, and C2-D4. The man she had fallen in love with – Theron Shan.

She ran, thinking that they would run from her if they knew how she truly felt, what she felt for them.

After all, when she was a girl, she had wanted to fly, but people cannot _fly_. They can only fall, crashing to the ground.  
  
  
A call to help had led her to assist Darth Marr, and forced her into the sights of the Eternal Emperor, Volkarion. He had seen something within her that mirrored himself. And when Darth Marr fell, and she killed Volkarion, something had happened, and then she was Volkarion and Volkarion was her and they were the same except they weren't. She was in control, but she could speak with him. She was blamed for his death.

Five years later, she woke up, knowing she had to save the galaxy once again. Lana Beniko and others, people who she learned to think of as friends.

The Voidhound became known as the Outlander – a _hero_ to the fallen Republic and Sith Empire and a _threat_ to the Eternal Empire.

Once again, she had been forced into a role that didn't fit her.

Once again, she was expected to save the galaxy.

Was that _destiny_? Was that _fate_?

Perhaps it was – but she has never believed in destiny. Nothing is set in stone. Not for her.

And when a man told her that he could not see her destiny. And when destiny was supposed to be something more important than anything else. And when power that was not hers had surged through her body, shaking her bones, making her shiver, lightning crackling around her arms and fingers – only then did she understand that there was nothing but her.  
  
  
She has never believed in things like destiny and fate – they are intangible, things she can't see or touch and understand. She believes in things that she can see and touch and understand, things that will always be real, like the feel of blaster file and kissing someone in the morning, like the sound of a friend's encouragement and that secrets don't always stay secret.

She knows who she loves and who she hates (and she knows why she loves them and hates them.)

She can pinpoint Coruscant and Tatooine and Nar Shaddaa on a map.

But fate? Destiny? Those are things she may never understand.  
  
  
(And in the end, she doesn't care about them. Not really.)


End file.
